The past few weeks, we’ve been exploring The Force of Communication and how powerful it can be in your development and your leadership role.
This week, let’s move on to Part Four of our series with some more learning points for you to consider when becoming a better communicator.
Many of our best opportunities are great communication is going to be one-on-one. These communications are going to be successful based on how deep the relationship goes. The goals of our interpersonal communications should always be:
to establish the relationship
to build up the relationship
to increase the relationship
to deepen the relationship
to maintain the relationship
So, keeping these objectives in mind as far as developing relationships and increasing communication, here are some thoughts to help us in our communications and develop these skills to further communicate with others to hit our relationship objectives.
1. Genuine Affection
You don’t have to tell your next-door neighbor how much you adore and love them, and at the same time, we do need to let people know how we feel about them and what the relationship means to you. How many parents never tell the children how much they love them? A lot. How many spouses do the same thing? A lot. How many leaders? A lot. Many of these relationships are not as deep and meaningful as they should be. Don’t neglect this powerful component.
2. Genuine Vulnerability
Relationships can never deepen without some vulnerability. I just conducted a workshop a couple of months ago, where we were doing a goal-setting session, and a person who was on the team refused to share their goals with the rest of the team, in fact, they quit the next day. A blessing in itself as many leaders never require their team members to become vulnerable with each other, therefore, no true trust is ever cultivated. This is usually driven by a deep fear of rejection by people of the others they are in relationship with, so they continue to wear a “mask” for fear of showing what really matters to them. The power comes when you are totally vulnerable with others and they 100% accept you for where and who you are. Make no mistake, there can be no growth without vulnerability.
3. Genuine Fun
Having fun and communicating fun is essential. Be careful not to try to “schedule fun”, it won’t work. Deepen the relationship and allow it to happen naturally.
4. Genuine Understanding
Seek first to understand others, then to be understood. If everyone did this, we would all be seeking to understanding each other first, right? Find ways to communicate that lets the other person see more of your genuine, authentic self. Also, become a great listener and makes notes to yourself on understanding others.